Yeah, I was one of those guys. No, not the ones who set up a petition proclaiming they were boycotting the existence of a game they’d just go out and buy anyway. Not at all. That’s far too political for my tastes anyway.

Instead, I was one of the many who caught wind of Left 4 Dead 2 and boldly cried out “TOO SOON!”

And, at the time, that really seemed to be the case. The first Left 4 Dead came out just seven months earlier, leaving devout fans of the series (including myself) wondering why Valve would promote such a rash and seemingly foolish gesture.

Soon enough, questions began to flare:

• Why the hell isn’t this DLC?
• What about that game I bought last November? You’re dropping support for it already?
• What’s going on with zany Zoey, buckeye Bill, funky Francis, and lucky Louis? You just gonna ditch those guys too?
• How you expect me to buy a new Left 4 Dead game every year? I’ve still gotta get Madden, Guitar Hero, and the next Call of Duty. I don’t have money for this shit!

So when the game finally came out, I was admittedly quick to judge. After playing just a single campaign, I boldly stated I didn’t see any reason for Left 4 Dead 2 to exist as a stand-alone game.

But boy, was I wrong. Not only did a second go at Left 4 Dead 2 leave my face with an expression much like this one—it totally rocked my socks (and how!).

I won’t waste your time talking about what’s unchanged from the first game; for the most part, it’s essentially the same. You’re a group of four nobodies, immune to zombie-itis (tee hee—kinda looks like it says “zombie tits”), fighting your way to freedom using whatever guns and makeshift explosives you find along the way. Along with regular infected, several breeds of “super infected” are out to make your trek from point A to point B a real bitch. If you know anything about the original, then you pretty much know what you’re getting into here.

So instead, I’m focusing on the differences and what’s new, because if you’re interested in this L4D2, you need to the play the original Left 4 Dead first. If you haven’t, you’re missing out.

First of all, I’d must clarify one thing: there definitely enough new content available to warrant a purchase, that’s for sure. While on the outside the game seems to be nothing more than a glorified map pack, looks are damn deceiving. And for that, I have this to say:

Sowwy for talking bad about your game, Valve. *sad face*

With that out of the way, let’s carry on:

The level design is bloody magnificent. While not the prettiest game on the market, each stage is completely unique, offering its own set of twists and turns. My personal favorite was the Hard Rain campaign where the sky opens up every few seconds sending a torrential downpour your way, making it nearly impossible to see your friends—and more importantly—your enemies.

Missions also play a part in Left 4 Dead 2, but not in the traditional sense (a la Goldeneye). What was once “Hit that switch there and hold onto your hats” is now “Hit that switch there and 1) fill this car with gas so we can peace the fuck out, 2) cross that massive bridge before we gets eated, or 3) get guy some soda so he lets us live.” Each stage has its own twist, adding depth that the first game unfortunately lacked wouldn’t have fit in a downloadable patch.

L4D2 also adds three new special infected to the roster: the Spitter, the Charger, and the Jockey. All in all, the new special infected (with the exception of the Jockey) are freakin’ stupendous. The Charger is much like a mini-Tank, blitzing through the horde so he can slam you against a wall, grab you by your waist, and pound you to the ground repeatedly. The Spitter does just what its name implies—spits at you. The game refers to it as “goo”, but the sizzling sounds and fumes that eminiate from it imply acid, at best.

Oh, and then there’s the Jockey, a completely annoying and frustrating enemy that makes goofy-ass sounds as it humps and pulls you away from your allies. Stupid Jockey.

Melee weapons are undoubtedly the best thing Valve could have done for the franchise. Most of them are obvious homages to other popular zombie and video game franchises, bringing a warming touch of nostalgia to your regular zombie bashings. Crowbars, cricket bats, katanas, machetes, and even frying pans are at your disposal. Truly, melee weapons are a thing of glory.

All of the game modes from the original L4D are back (including my beloved Survival mode—mmm…) along with a few extras. Scavenge mode has you completing missions while other players control the special infected to prevent you from clearing the stage. There’s also a Realism mode where items and allies aren’t highlighted, making the game a slightly more challenging.

Unfortunately, the dystopian world of Left 4 Dead 2 is far from perfect. The hit detection is horrible, and as wonderful as the melee weapons are, I can’t fathom the idea of swinging a katana in a sea of zombies and not hitting a single one. I’ve even fired sniper rifles at point-blank range only to miss completely. While not common enough to piss on your parade, it’s the video game equivalent of putting a dime into a vending machine and having it drop down into the coin-return slot. Not a day-wrecker, but still annoying.

The AI dun’ gone got stupid since the last game. While the original Left 4 Dead’s AI wasn’t without its faults, it was more endearing than it was infuriating. In Left 4 Dead 2, your computer propelled buddies dumb as a sack of socks. While they’re capable of basic functions (erratic movement, taking the weapon you wanted, etc.), getting one to back you during battle is like asking a stroke victim to perform brain surgery. I once watched a computer-controlled Rochelle get choked to death by a smoker while a computer-controlled Coach watched in awe from thirty feet away. *facepalms*

On top of it all, I’ve noticed the game to occasionally award special infected kills inappropriately. I’ve killed many a Smoker only to see the credit go to some other NPC. I know it really doesn’t matter, and I’m probably just nit-picking, but in my line of work credit is everything. I want the tally for killing super zombies, damn it! At least give me that much.

Sadly, the new characters in Left 4 Dead 2 aren’t as memorable as Zoey, Bill, Francis, and Louis from the first game. While they each have their merits, you just don’t feel the same connection as you had with the original cast. Maybe it was that magnificent introduction in the first game that really linked us to the fearsome foursome, but either way, Nick, Rochelle, Ellis, and Coach are at least tolerable (though Rochelle seems like she was thrown in there just to add a female character, completely lacking of any distinguishing characteristics).

Oh, and Coach easily has the most badass set of mitts I’ve ever seen in a video game. I know, I know; it doesn’t make sense, but play as him and you’ll understand.

Changing the difficulty doesn’t affect the Director as it did in the first Left 4 Dead. Maybe it’s just me, but in the original game, upping the difficulty sent more infected your way and spawned a lot more special infected. In Left 4 Dead 2, it seems the only difference is how quickly you take damage. What a shame.

One more thing if you’re considering Left 4Dead 2: make sure you have a handful of friends to play with—or at least a neighbor or sibling who will play split-screen with you. While you can play by yourself, L4D2 is a lot like sex: the more, the merrier. A Gold account and a solid Internet connection is your ticket to zombie heaven, just as it was in the first game.

The Final Verdict

So if Valve graces us with another title in the Left 4 Dead franchise this November, will I complain? Maybe. But Left 4 Dead 2 certainly keeps my hopes alive if Valve intends on making this an annual event.

While I certainly have my share of complaints, and while the original does still shine brightly (in some ways, brighter than the sequel), the second title in the franchise is a must if you were ever even remotely obsessed with the first L4D. Left 4 Dead 2 is fun and entertaining, offering countless hours of—er—fun and entertainment. You’re definitely getting your money’s worth, even if it seems like you’re just paying for a second-helping of the first game.

Images by Richard Schupp

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